Not Alone

It has been a tough morning.... After Jeff left for work, I went back in bed to sleep a little bit longer. All I could think about was that dreadful night walking into Deaken's hospital room, His lifeless body, two nurses performing CPR and the doctors all around Jeff and I. This is a vision I often play over and over in my head, I wish things could of been so different. I often think about all the nurses that took care of Deaken, he was so loved. We could tell his nurses had a special bond with our little Deaken. His night nurse called him her "little boyfriend" and we knew he was well taken care of at night when we weren't there. That night when we chose to stop the CPR, the two nurses performing were in tears. I am so grateful for the angels who took care of Deaken and hope that someday when we are ready we can go back there and let them know how much we appreciate them.

I know God was with me this morning as I cried and know he continues to carry me....A good friend shared Deaken's story and about CHD to co-workers, each month they choose a charity to raise money for and the co-workers voted to raise money for CHD! She said nobody ever heard anything about Congenital Heart Defects....How is it that every 13 minutes a baby is born with a CHD, yet most have never heard about it???? I think it is safe to assume these people have children or plan on it. Deaken sure has made an impact on so many people in his short 26 days, I am so proud to be his mommy. Thank you Mil for sharing Deaken's story and for helping raise awareness=)